i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
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