Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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