"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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