I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
