You're a womanizer and a bitch.
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
