Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
