You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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