whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
