In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
