apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
