Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
