Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Randomize