My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize