You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
