real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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