I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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