is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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