jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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