I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize