But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
