I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
