I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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