hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i already hear my dad disowning me
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
