He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
