You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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