Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
