just come out here and I will go home with you...
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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