the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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