you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Randomize
