I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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