Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
