I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Randomize
