Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Less talking, more tequila
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize