Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
