god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
