i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize