I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Damn victory sex feels great
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
