whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
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