Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
