I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Green mimosas i think yes
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
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