: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
