My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
There's a naked man in my car right now.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
