Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize