Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
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