Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
