he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
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