White coat. Heels.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
