So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
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