Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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