So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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